


iHave Bipolar

by CaptHyatt



Category: iCarly
Genre: Hurt-Comfort, Romance
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2010-12-06
Updated: 2010-12-29
Packaged: 2014-07-25 01:40:58
Rating: K+
Chapters: 8
Words: 9,573
Publisher: www.fanfiction.net
Story URL: https://www.fanfiction.net/s/6535659/1/
Author URL: https://www.fanfiction.net/u/2425687/CaptHyatt
Summary: Freddie learns he has bipolar disorder, and has to take pills to keep it under control. He decides to keep it secret from his friends. But when it finally is found out, Sam decides to steal Freddie's pills. All goes well until consequences appear.





	1. iGet the News

**My first iCarly Fan fiction, so give me some sort of leniency. **

**Repeat of the Basic plot (Thanks in part to 1seddiefan) Freddie learns he has bipolar disorder, and has to take pills to keep it under control, and when Sam learns, steals them from his apartment. Unknown to her, this act has dire consequences. **

**Disclaimer: I own nothing that is related to iCarly.**

Freddie's POV

Well, it was a normal visit to the doctor; I think my third one this week, but my mom insisted something seemed… off about me, personally, I didn't think anything was wrong, but, it's my mother, so what can you do?

"Freddie, it's fine! There will be nothing different about this visit than any other time." Mrs. Benson said, trying to calm her son down.

"How do you know? Huh? Can you read my mind? Just because you are my mother doesn't mean you know me!" I yelled at my mom.

She gasped at my sudden anger. She knew something was wrong, but didn't know what. But the symptoms seemed so familiar. "I'm sorry mom, I didn't mean to yell at you. You're right, everything is ok."

As soon as Freddie finished his "apology", the doctor walked in with a small frown, signaling to Mrs. Benson her fears were confirmed. "Mrs. Benson, Freddie. From the tests we ran earlier during your visit, we did find something."

"You found something? What is it? You better tell me or I'll kill you!" I yelled, threatening the doctor. "My diagnostics confirmed. Mrs. Benson, you son has bipolar disorder."

Freddie's mother didn't know what to say, it wasn't bad, but it wasn't good either. She looked at her son, who was sitting still on the examination bed. "I can't believe it… I just can't believe it. There really is something wrong with me!" I yelled, starting to cry. My mom came over and hugged me. "Is there anything you can do to help him? I mean, he can't live his normal life is he is yelling every five seconds." She said to the doctor.

"Well, I can prescribe him Valproate, which is the best pill for bipolar disorder." He said, filling out the prescription sheet. "Here, I'll call the pharmacy myself and ask if they can get it today. The sooner we can get him on it, I hate saying this… The sooner he can function in normal life. But until we know it's under control… He has to stay in your apartment Mrs. Benson."

That statement struck like a dagger into my heart. _The sooner he can function in normal life. _I'm not that sick, am I? And I have to stay in my apartment! "What is this!" I yelled at the doctor, "Mom, you know I have to do iCarly, I can't stay in the apartment!"

"As long as you have sudden out burst like that you will mister." My mom calmy responded. "I'm sorry Freddie, it's for the best. One of my other patients had bipolar disorder and I told him to stay inside till he knew it was under control. Didn't listen, and he killed someone." The doctor added, "Though, with this pill, it should only be a day until it's fully under control, after which it is up to the patient, sometimes, bipolar disorder can be controlled easier with a strong mental will."

We walked out of the office after paying for the visit and getting the form for the pills. It was six thirty in the evening, and I looked up to a setting sun. "The regime of old Freddie is over," I thought to myself, "Tomorrow, I guess a new life begins… Boy, what am I gonna tell Carly and… Sam… No, I can't tell them, then all they would care about it trying to be fake nice to me! And who knows what Sam would do…"

We stopped at the local pharmacy and picked up my pills. As soon as my mom picked up the bag, we went back out to the car. I was expecting her to immediately open the bottle and make me take one… But she didn't. Something wasn't right.

It was totally quiet on the way home. After parking the car and got into the elevator after passing the screaming Lubert, the elevator door opened to our floor. My mom briskly walked to our apartment and opened the door. I slowly followed behind. I heard another door open and I looked up to see Carly standing in her doorway in her pj's.

"About time you guys got back, you've been gone all day!" She joked, but then saw Freddie's face and that happiness quickly turned to concern. "What's wrong Freddie? You haven't looked that depressed since Sam pulled that whole first kiss thing on iCarly." She asked, walking up next to me.

The only way I could answer was to shake my head and say, "You have no idea." Leaving her on that, I closed the door to my apartment.

**A/N: So, Freddie decides to hide his problem from Sam, Carly, and presumably Spencer. Will he be able to, or will acts of random mood swings appear and blow the cover? Next chapter to be up soon. **


	2. iStart a New Life

**iStart a New Life**

"Freddie! Have you taken your first pill yet?" Yelled my mother from the kitchen. "I'm going to! Give me a break! We just got home!" I yelled back, slamming the door to my room and flopping on my bed. "Freddie, do you want to… be normal again?" She asked from the other side of the door. Normal again? What? Is having bipolar disorder really that bad?

"FINE!" I screamed at her. But as I opened the door, I quickly apologized to her. "I'm sorry mom, I really just can't control myself… It's so weird. I feel fine at one point, angry at another, and then really depressed at the end."

"Well, at least we can attempt to control it. Here is your first dosage. Take it and get some sleep, no school for you tomorrow, doctors orders." My mom stated, closing the door. "Huh, that's cool. Too bad it's for a terrible reason." I picked up the pill and looked at it for a few minutes. "Fredward! HAVE YOU TAKEN IT YET!" I heard my mom yell from her room. "Yes!" I answered back. Might as well not completely lie to her. And thus began my treatment.

The next day I woke up really early… Maybe around 5-ish. I opened my door to see if my mom had woken up yet. The living room and the kitchen were still dark, so I guess she hadn't. I closed the door and walked out onto my balcony (or the fire escape, but I have made it into my own personal balcony). Seattle was just now starting to wake up, with the buses running people to their jobs and the lights guiding them to their daily routine.

"Freddie?" I heard from behind. I turned around to see my mom peaking her head in the door. "Oh, hey mom, did I wake you up?" I asked, still looking at the skyline. "No, I was already awake, couldn't get any sleep. How you feeling." She asked. "Really, I don't know. I mean, it's something that you really don't know when or how it will happen. It just does. Normally, I think I'd be either crying or yelling at you right now." I responded, turning around in my chair to look at my mother.

She nodded and sat down on my bed. "Look dear, the sun is starting to come up." My mom observed. "Yeah, thanks for the update…" I said, rolling my eyes and then slapping myself on the head. "Sorry, kind of just slipped out." I apologized. "Don't apologize to me. Apologize to yourself Fredward. Those pills aren't the only things you have to do in order to gain control over your ill temper. Bacon and eggs good for breakfast?" She questioned, already heading out the door.

"Yeah, that's fine," I responded, putting my hands on the railing. "Well, good morning Seattle. My new life begins." I said, walking back into my room and grabbing the pill case. I took one out and swallowed it. "Ugh, terrible taste!" I exclaimed, trying to get the taste out of my mouth with mouthwash. "Freddie! Breakfast is ready!" My mom sang from the kitchen. "Oh, this is going to be a long day."

**Sam's POV**

Well, it was a normal morning for me. Waking up, throwing some clothes on, and finding my mother drunk and asleep on the couch, "Guess momma has to make her own breakfast… Or go to Carly's…" I said, walking out the door. I arrived at the Shay's about thirty minutes before we had to leave for school. "Hey people!" I yelled as I barged in through their door.

"You ever knock?" Carly asked. "Nope, I consider myself a part of this family." I answered with a grin on my face. Carly just shook her head and went back to eating her cereal. I decided to get up and go over to their fridge. "Sam, the ham and bacon are in the back." Carly said without even looking up at me. "Oh, thanks Carls." I responded, throwing the meat on the table. I pulled out a plate and sat myself down at the table, staring at the food. Carly slowing lifted her head up with that questioning face of "Why?"

"Well, you don't expect me to cook it, and I doubt you trust Spencer to cook it… So…" I said, trying to get her to finish the statement for me. "…Fine! I'll cook it for you!" Carly finally answered, throwing her hands in the air. "Good. Wake me up when you're done." I commanded, jumping onto the sofa and falling asleep.

As I fell asleep Spencer came out of his room. "Hey kiddo and," He started, noticing me asleep on the couch, "friend, did she knock? And why are you cooking bacon and ham?" He asked, pointing at both of us. "Sam thinks she is a part of our family, and she is to lazy to cook her own food." Carly responded. "I am not! I just have to conserve me strength to eat the food." I responded, lifting my head up from the pillow. "Hey! You're supposed to be asleep!" Carly joked. Couldn't argue with that.

"So, what's on your agenda today Spencer?" Carly asked her brother. "Nothing really, just going to go with Socko to the junkyard to get some stuff for a sculpture I'm making." He answered. "Of…?" Carly continued. "Oh, I don't really know." Spencer said, "Oh, that's him, you two have a good day at school!" Spencer exclaimed as he ran out the door. "Sam! You're food is done!" Carly yelled from the kitchen. "Yes! Thanks Carls!" I cheered as I devoured the cooked meat.

"Wow… Three slices of ham and five slices of bacon, all in thirty seconds. A new record." Carly half-heartedly said. "Yep, momma likes her bacon and ham in the morning." I responded back, wiping the excess food on my sleeve. "We'd better get going." Carly added, grabbing her jacket. We walked out of her apartment and knocked on Freddork's door. Mrs. Benson opened the door, "Good morning you two!" She greeted us. Ugh… "Hey Mrs. Benson, is Freddie ready to go?" Carly asked.

"He can't go to school today, he's feeling sick." Mrs. Benson answered us. "I'm NOT sick mother!" We heard in the background. Was that Freddichinni? "Yes you are!" His mom yelled back. "Sorry you had to hear that, the flu can make Fredward cranky." We couldn't help but laugh. "Ok, we'll get him his homework." Carly assured his mom. She closed the door and we went to the elevator. "Wonder what that was all about?" I asked Carly, who I could tell was trying her hardest not to laugh. "I don't know, but I hope I don't get cranky from the flu!" She said, bursting out into laughter.

**A/N: Well, there you go. Hope that gets you on the edge of your seats. Yeah! Alright… That's all the witty remarks I can make… Next chapter will be up soon!**


	3. iFeel Weird

**iFeel Weird**

**Freddie's POV**

I spent most of the day watching TV or messing with electronic gear for iCarly. "Come on you stupid piece of junk! Why won't you work?" I yelled at my computer. "Freddie! If you keep acting like that, you're going to have to stay in your room for another day!" My mom responded from the living room. "Sorry." I apologized for like the twentieth time today.

"Hey mom, do you think I will be able to do iCarly tonight?" I asked, coming out of my room to grab a drink. "Depends, think you can control yourself and not do anything that would make me regret letting you have _any _freedom?" She asked me, turning around and looking me straight in the eyes. "No, you won't mother. I promise." I answered. "Wait! Fredward… Have you taken your pill yet?"

It seemed like forever before Carly and Sam came back from school. "I'm going to get something to eat… And then go to sleep, that cool with you Carls?" Sam asked. "Well, if I say no, will it matter?" Carly responded. "Um… Nope!" Sam laughed. Carly shook her head and walked over to my apartment. Before she knocked I opened the door and greeted her. "Well, look who we have here. You don't look so cranky to me." Carly joked. "Yeah, ha ha ha. The fever broke a few hours after you left, and well, my mom didn't really care if I went to school or not… You have my homework?" I asked.

"Weird, that doesn't sound like your mother… Yeah, here you go. You missed an _exciting_ lesson in Mrs. Briggs class, and well, Mr. Howard was Mr. Howard. You going to be able to do iCarly tonight?" She asked, handing me the homework. "Yeah, I'm just going to have to take my mom's list of 'recommended pills' to control the 'dormant' flu." I stated, using my hands to create quotation marks. "Whatever that means, see you in a few." Carly responded.

Carly went back into her apartment and saw Sam watching Girly Cows and eating ham. "Is Fredweird going to make it tonight, or is he going to skip because he thinks he's sick?" She asked. "Yeah, he's coming… Give him a little break, and I DON'T mean his bones." Carly growled at her friend. "Fine, fine. I'll act like I care about how Freddork feels." Sam finally answered.

**Sam's POV**

It was about 6 when Fredwad came over. "Look who it is! Momma's boy himself!" I exclaimed. "Yeah nice to see you as well Sam… Where's Carly?" Freddie asked. "She's upstairs getting ready, I think it has been about an hour now." I answered, still focusing on the TV. "Ah, so, how was school today?" He asked, sitting down at the computer. "Eh, nothing new, got sent to the principal's office, ate potato salad, the usual." I stated, finally looking at him.

"Well, at least you didn't change anything, I don't think my heart can take a change from Sam Puckett." Freddie joked, "Come on! Why won't this stupid page load?" I heard Freddie yell at the computer. "Jeez, calm down, even an internet boy like you should know that it doesn't work all the time." I said, wondering what the heck was wrong with Fredward. "Yeah, but when I need to get something done, I don't want to wait for it!" He responded. "It's called patience. Get some." I laughed, getting up to grab a drink. "Oh yeah, like you know what patience is. You broke a snack machine because it was taking too long to give you your fatcake." Freddie sternly responded. "Hey, nothing stands between momma and her fatcakes… Nothing." I responded, pointing my finger at him. "Sure." Freddie smiled. That's so weird. He was mad one second, now he's happy?

"You guys ready!" We heard from upstairs. "Yeah! Let's go Freddork." I said as I jumped over the couch and headed up to the studio. Carly was already getting warming up when me and Freddie finally came into studio. "You guys remember what we are going to do for this show?" Carly asked, hoping that I remembered to tell Freddie. "Carly, do I look like a person to remind another of what we are doing?" I questioned, grabbing my blue remote. "You're right. Why would I ask that in the first place?" Carly said rolling her eyes.

"You ladies ready?" Freddie asked, grabbing his video camera. "Yeah, let's roll!" I cheered, throwing my hands into the air. "Awesome. In 5, 4, 3, 2!" Freddie counted off, I don't know why but I always found that… kinda attractive. Wait! What? Don't think like that! He's a nub! "I'm Carly!" "And I'm Sam!" And this is iCarly!" We both cheered, "The only place where gravity is reversed ninety percent of the time!" Sam joked. "Wait? Really? Huh, never noticed it." Carly said sarcastically. "We have a great show lined up for you tonight!" Carly stated.

Everything went fine for the first half of the show, but then me and Carly noticed something was slowly changing about Freddie. We switched over to a fan-made video and walked over to Freddie. "Hey nub, what the chizz is wrong with you?" I demanded. "I don't know… I just feel really tired all of the sudden, I don't just don't know." He responded, rubbing his chest near his heart. "Do you want to go home?" Carly asked with concerned eyes. "No, I'm fine, the video is almost over." He responded. We both jogged over to our spots. "Wow Sam, that clip was A-maze-ing!" Carly exclaimed. "I know right. I got _lost_ in its awesomeness!" I stated. **(A/N: The clip was about how you could get out of a maze the quickest.)**

"Now its time for one of our most favorite parts of the show, _Messing with Lubert!_" We both cheered while I pressed the audience-clapping button. "For this prank, we're going to have Gibby dressed as a pizza delivery man and pretend to deliver two hundred pizzas!" Carly laughed, "Freddie, switch to lobby cam." The TV didn't change from the iCarly logo like Carly asked. "Hey! Dork! Did you hear Carly?" I yelled at him. Freddie finally looked up and started to walk over to his computer, I didn't know if Carly heard it, but to me, it sounded like he was having a hard time breathing. "Switching… to… um, hold—" He said as he fell forward onto the floor. "Freddie!" Carly screamed as she ran over to his side.

"What's wrong with him?" I asked, with worry in my voice. "I don't know! Freddie, can you hear me?" She yelled into his ear. No response. "Sam, go get my brother!" She demanded, trying to find a pulse on Freddie. "Right!" I quickly answered. "Spencer! SPENCER!" I screamed at the top of my lungs. "What!" He asked from the bottom of the stairs. "Something is wrong with Freddie! Get up here now!" I cried. "Coming!" Spencer said as he ran by me into the studio. I followed him; feeling like my heart was about to be ripped out of my chest. "Spencer, what's wrong with him?" Carly asked through her tears. "Call an ambulance. We have to get him to the hospital."

**A/N: Oh no! What happened to Freddie? And does Sam actually give a flip about Freddie? Sorry if this chapter is kind of… I guess rambling. 2 a.m. does that to you.**


	4. iHave no Pity

**iHave no Pity**

**Sam's POV**

Me and Carly jumped out of Spencer's car and ran into the hospital lobby. "Where is he!" I cried to the receptionist. Why I was crying I'll never know… Must have been those onions I ate. "Sam, she doesn't know who 'he' is! Sorry ma'm, um, do you know what room, or how, Freddie Benson is?" Carly asked the lady.

"Let's see, Freddie Benson, he's in-" She started before being cut off by a doctor walking into the lobby. "He's in room 211, and he is fine. Oh, sorry, my name is Doctor Valdez." He said. "Where is my baby?" We heard someone scream from the doorway. Of course, it was mamma boys mother herself. "Doctor, what happened to my Freddie?" She asked the doctor, trying not to get her tears all over him.

"Freddie suffered a minor heart attack." He answered. What? A heart attack! He's sixteen for chizz sakes! Have I really been causing so much stress on him that he goes and has a heart attack? I should have suspected something when he was acting weird. But, nothing comes between momma and her ham. Wait, Sam… Focus!

"A heart attack, are you serious?" Carly gasped, still trying to process the statement when her brother walked in. "What happened to Freddo?" He questioned. "He had a heart attack." I answered, staring at the floor. "What? He's sixteen! How can a sixteen year old Freddie have a heart attack?" Spencer demanded. "Maybe is you all stopped talking I could answer!" Doctor Valdez boomed over us. "Right, sorry doctor." Spencer said, backing away.

"When Freddie arrived at the hospital, we started immediately running test to see what was wrong. What we found… Was, if you hadn't call when you did, fatal. What it was a Transmural Myocardial Infraction." The doctor said, but noticed that none of us understood a word he said, "Basically, his heart completely shut down, and his ENTIRE body was deprived of oxygen rich blood. Thankfully, we were able to get his heart beating again before any permanent damage was done." He explained.

"But what would have caused that?" I asked, afraid of the answer I was going to get. "Well, his blood was rich with valproic acid, an anti-depressant." We all looked at each other shocked and confused. "What do you mean?" Mrs. Benson questioned. "Does Freddie take anti-depressants?" Valdez asked, although we all figured he knew anyway. "Yes, a few days ago we learned that my son had…" She stopped, looking at us, I guess making sure that we were ready for what she was about to say.

"Freddie has bipolar disorder, and the doctor prescribed him Valproate, which I assume has valproic acid in it. But how can that hurt him? I thought that the dosage was low enough to be alright." His mom answered. "It is, but it gets dangerous if he takes more that he is suppose to. How many was he suppose to take per day?" Valdez asked. "One per day." Mrs. Denson responded looking at the floor. "We found at least a week's worth in his system. That, Mrs. Benson, is VERY dangerous." We all nodded in agreement.

Spencer and Mrs. Benson went to go grab us something to eat. Me and Carly were sitting in the lobby, just trying to find something to talk about. "Wow, and you think you know someone." I finally said breaking the silence. "Yeah, I guess that explains why he was acting so weird these past few weeks. And I thought you finally drove him mad." Carly sadly joked. "Wow, harsh Carls." I responded. "Sorry." "Though, you do have to admit, it was kind of his fault for this whole thing." I stated, yes, I do realize what I said. "Sam! How was this Freddie's fault!" She almost screamed at me.

"Well, I guess without his mother, he doesn't know how to read the bottle. What a nub. Psh, depressive people are such babies." I said, "I'm going to go find something to mess up, call me when your bro and Frednub's mother arrives?" I asked. "What do you think?" She sternly answered. "Yes." I added, walking towards the gift shop. "No matter what happens… Sam is always going to make a situation worse. No sympathy, no pity, nothing. Freddie has a flippin' heart attack, and she blames him for it. If I knew better, she had a fair hand in this as well." Carly thought to herself.

Hey, don't be mad at me. I'm just speaking the truth. Half of my family is in jail, and you don't see me complaining about it. Ok, so Frednerd has bipolar disorder, and because of his "problem" he has to take pills to control it. And because of those pills, he had a heart attack and ended up in the hospital. Big whoop. You know, maybe I should help him out. Ya know, get rid of what caused his emergency. Those being the pills. I mean, what's the worse that could happen?

Before I could think of any reason of _why_ not to do this act, my phone buzzed. "Your ribs… and ham… and what I assume bacon… Is here Sam. Keep your mouth shut… You know what I'm talking about." Carly told me before she hung up. "Jeez, bossy." I sighed as I walked back towards the lobby. Spencer, Carly, and Mrs. Benson had already started eating when I finally arrived. "Hey kiddo, where you been?" Spencer asked in his somewhat childish tone. "Just checking out the gift shop, you get momma her food?" I questioned. "Yep." Carly answered for him, throwing the bag of food at my face.

"Hey! What the chizz Carly?" I yelled at her. "Oh, I'm sorry, did that hurt? Guess you should of caught it." She answered, not even looking at me. "Ok…" I mumbled, devouring my ribs. We spent about another two hours in the lobby before something happened. "I'm bored!" I moaned, "Want to play rock, paper, punch to the face?" I asked Carly. "What? No!" She sternly answered, going back to reading her magazine. "Fine… be that way." As I got up to get some water, the doctor came walking in. "Freddie's awake."

**A/N: Well, is what Sam planning the right thing to do? Or does she not understand exactly what bipolar disorder is. How will the iCarly gang respond to finally being able to see Freddie? Will these questions ever stop being asked? I hope so! Next Chapter up soon!**


	5. iExecute the Plan

iExecute the Plan

**Sam's POV**

It seemed like an eternity before we reached the room that Fredwad was in. Doctor Valdez looked at us for a few seconds before nodding and walking back down the hall. "Sam, you alright? You look pale." Carly stated, looking me directly in the eyes.

"Yeah, I'm fine… Let's just get this over with, I'm hungry." I answered, roling my eyes. "Right, at least act like you care." Carly demanded as Spencer opened the door. As we walked in, the first person we saw was Mrs. Benson sitting on Fredward's left side. She didn't even look at us when we came in. Of course, the next image we saw, well, I guess you could say would haunt us until we die. There were at least five different machines, all monitoring something in his body, two IV drops, and just a bunch of wires running from the bed to different things.

"Hey guys." Freddie weakly said, trying to wave his hand at us. Carly ran over and gently placed it back to his side. "Don't… you need to conserve your strength. How are you doing?" She asked sweetly. "How do you think? I just had a flipping heart attack, oh, it's just peachy." Freddie snapped, causing his heart rate to rise dramatically. "Freddie! Remain calm. Remember what the doctor said." We heard his mom say from the other side of the room. "Sorry Carly, didn't mean to." He apologized to her.

I walked over next to him and placed my hand on his. "Listen nub, your doctor told us about your… I guess one could call a problem." I said, trying so hard not to laugh at the face he made. "Wait; was it the deal about toenail?" He asked, trying to sit up, but getting pushed back down by Spencer. "What? No! Your bipolar disorder!" I yelled at him, beginning to realize how angry I am he didn't tell me. "Yeah! How come you didn't tell us Freddie? We're your best friends! Or at least I thought we were." Carly added, starting to cry.

Freddie looked at both of us with concerning eyes, trying to find something to say. He opened his mouth, but it closed when Carly shot him a glaring look. "How long have you had it?" I finally asked, breaking the silence. Wait, why would I care? "I don't know. My doctor told me about it when I went in to get one of my regular…" He said, glaring at his mom, "Checkups, when one of the tests he ran showed that I had it. I'm sorry I hid it from you guys." He said, trying to get us to stop crying.

"Freddie, I think-" Spencer started, but was shushed by his little sister. "Why didn't you tell us? Why, why, why?" Carly cried again. "Yeah, why Fredweird?" I added, wiping the tears from my eyes… What? Something got in them. "That's why!" He yelled, startling everyone in the room. "Little Princess Puckett over there makes fun of me for EVERYTHING, and telling you guys that I was sick wouldn't have helped me in her awesomeness ranking… And besides, who knows, she would have probably announced it to the whole iCarly audience!" Freddie screamed.

As soon as he finished his rant, we heard the door open and Doctor Valdez and two nurses come running in. "Freddie! We need you to calm down! Your heart is in a very fragile state right now." The Doctor said, placing his hands on Freddie's shoulders. "Doctor, his blood pressure is skyrocketing." One of the nurses stated. He nodded and looked at us, "I'm sorry; I need you to leave the room." We nodded and walked out of the room and started heading towards the lobby.

"Why would he not tell us that he is sick… seems so unprofessional." I observed, opening the door to Spencer's car. "You know, if you didn't make fun of him for everything like he said, he wouldn't have been afraid to tell us." Carly growled at me while looking at a window on the hospital. "What do you mean Carls?" I questioned, wanting to get back to Carly's apartment. "What do you think Sam?" She demanded, but before I could answer she started talking again. "All you do is give him grief about his life; you have only been nice to him maybe five times in our entire friendship. Maybe you are the source of his anger, and YOU are the reason he is lying in that hospital bed!" She stated, nearly screaming the words. Out of the corner of my eye I saw Spencer turned had turned his head around.

"Carly, maybe that…" He started. "No, Spence, she's right. Now that I think about it. I have maybe pressed Freddork… I mean Freddie, towards this. It's just, that's the only thing I've ever known to do. What would the world think if I, Sam Puckett, started acting nice to everyone, let alone Freddie… It's not how I've been raised." I said as we got out of the car and walked into the lobby. "The world would blow up… Like phew phew phew!" Spencer joked, animating with his hands the world falling apart. "Funny Spencer… Very funny, but uncalled for." Cary scowled her brother.

"Right, sorry…" He apologized, pressing the button on the elevator for our, well, their floor. "Sam, listen, as difficult is for me to ever understand what your life is like, I doubt being kind would make a difference." Carly finally responded. "Yeah it would, remember when you tried to turn me into a girl, and that mammoth tried to hurt you? Momma wouldn't let that happen, no one steps on my friends." I grinned at Carly, starting to laugh at her feeble attempts awhile back. "Yeah, I knew it wouldn't last forever, just long enough to impress that boy." Carly laughed, stepping out of the elevator and following her brother. "Hey, I have to go… Remembered that I have to go get some bacon slices from… the store…" I groaned.

"Well, ok, remember, iCarly rehearsal tomorrow… Don't be fashionably early as you call it, this time." She asked, quoting the phrase "fashionable early" with her hands. "We're going to rehearse without fredman… Freddie!" I yelled trying to correct myself. "Yes… We are… See you later Sam…" Carly half smiled, slowing closing the door. "Yep!" I agreed. As soon as Carly closed her door, I pulled out one of my hairpins and started trying to unlock the Benson's door. It only took me a few seconds before I heard the lock click and the door swing open. "Thank you mother for locking me out of our house oh so many times." I whispered quietly into the air. "Now, where would Mrs. Benson put those pills?" I asked, looking through all of the cabinets and drawers. "Huh, might be in Freddie's room." I said, quietly opening the door to his room.

I took out me mini flashlight and turned it on. "Let's see, if I was prescribed pills, where would I be. Right, in my mom's stomach… Ummmm… Wait, what do we have here?" I said, noticing a small orange container on Freddie's bedside table. "Valproate… Never heard of it… But these must be the pills he is taking to control his bipolar. Well, Mr. Freddie Benson, I'm going to show you that you indeed can control it by yourself, and that it's not all my fault." I stated, taking out a blank container full of sugar pills, and carefully pulled the label off the prescribed container and placed it on the fake. "My work here is done." I observed, placing the pills in my pocket. I was walking out of his bedroom when I heard the front door being unlocked. "Crud."

**A/N: Wow, way to leave a cliff hanger! Sorry about the what, three days between updates, my personal computer, along with EVERY file (yes, including this story) is infected with the wonderful thing called malware, the one that creates a fake start up route and… Never mind, basically, until I get that wiped and Windows… I hope, 7, put on it, there will be gaps between updates. But anyhow, thank you all so much for the AWESOME reviews, you guys rock the world. **


	6. iReturn Home

**iReturn Home**

**Sam's POV**

"Mehh!" I heard from the outside of the door. "Well, at least I know it isn't a Benson." I exhaled, still hiding behind their sofa. "I hate this job! Why do I have to get Freddie's stupid pills, and check their dumb apartment?" Lewbert complained, closing the door behind him and turning on the living room lights. "Crud… Why the chiz does he need to check the apartment?" I whispered to myself. As Lewbert walked into the kitchen, I slowly maneuvered myself to stay out of his line of sight.

"Let's see… Marissa said that his pills were in his room." He stated, walking into Freddie's room. "Here they are! Wait, why is the label messed up… Eh, I don't care." Lewbert observed, closing Freddie's bedroom door and walking out of the apartment. "Nub," I commented, getting up from behind the book shelf, "He didn't check anything; all he did was stick his hand in their flour bag… Why didn't I think of that?" I questioned myself.

I made sure everything was back in its normal place before I left, if Freddie's mother came back and noticed anything out of place, here come the cops. I looked out the eyehole on the door to make sure the hall was clear, and noticing it was, I slowly crept out into the hallway. "Almost done." I whispered, trying to creep over to the elevator. About a second before I rounded the corner, I heard a door open behind me. "What's with all of these nosey people!" I screamed in my head. "Sam?" I heard a familiar voice say.

"Oh, hey Carls." I grinned. "What are you doing here? I thought you left an hour ago." She questioned, rubbing her eyes. "You know, I was just talking to the Pechecks… Checking on their… daughter in college, you know, Francine?" I lied, slowly creeping towards the beckoning elevator. "Right, she went to um… Some college in Texas right?" Carly tiredly mumbled, looking like she was about to fall over. "Right! Yeah! You obviously know what I'm talking about. So, just go back to bed sleepy head, big day tomorrow!" I joked, waving her back into her apartment. "Yep… Night Sam!" She mumbled again, closing the door. I smiled and walked into the opened elevator. "Too easy."

**Freddie's POV**

I can't believe this happened to me. Everything my mother has ever taught me, everything I've ever known in life, disregarded in one hour. Should have read the bottle, should have followed the instructions, but… I let the anger get to me, and well; the rest is history one could say. Now, I lie here in this stupid hospital bed, staring at the white walls all around me, listening to the machines that seemingly are monitoring every motion my body makes. I hate it. Could it get any worse? "Freddie!"

It just did….

"Yes mother?" I weakly responded, slowly sitting up in my bed, watching her enter the room. "Lewbert brought me your medicine. You want to take it?" My mom patiently asked. Wow, she is actually remaining calm. Either because she has finally come to her senses, or because the doctor told her to, I hope it's the first one. "Not right now. To tell you the truth, I don't really feel like doing anything." I responded, turning away from her so I wouldn't have to see the tears in her eyes. "Fine by me Freddie, by the way, I talked to the doctor today, he said if you feel good enough, you can return home whenever you want." She informed me, rubbing my back. "It's only been two days; I had a heart attack mother!" I snapped at her. "I know, but personally, I think you would recover much faster at home, in a surrounding you are comfortable with." She answered softly. "What makes you so sure that I want to even go back? All I ever get is stress, and anger, and abuse from a certain blonde-headed demon." I tried to yell, but couldn't.

"Do you want to stay here? Because you can't always hide from your problems dear, sometimes the best way to fix them is to attack them, figuratively, head on, and if you are talking about Sam, don't attack her, you would have just gotten out of the hospital." My mother explained, "Now, as much as I would hate to do this, it's for the best… Take the pill, you're going home tomorrow morning." I looked at her and then back at the pill. Might as well take the stupid thing. I grabbed the pill from her hand and promptly swallowed it down. "Happy? Now, if you wouldn't mind, it's twelve in the morning, I kinda wanted to get some sleep.

"Go ahead, I'm going home to get your bed and everything ready, I'll be back here at around ten thirty to get you checked out." She stated, getting up to leave. Before she did, she turned back around and looked me directly in the eyes, "I love you dear, no matter what happens to you or how you feel, I will always love you." And with that, my mom walked out of the room. "Love you too mom, love you too." I cried.

It seemed like an eternity before I fell asleep, something just didn't seem right. I felt, awake, happy, but at the same time, sad, and angry about what I did today. It was about two in the morning before I finally fell asleep, and just like that, I was woken up by my cheerful mother, and two other girls. "Morning Freddie!" Carly cheered. "Yeah, morning Freddork." Sam added, both of them helping me get out of the bed. "How you holding up?" Sam asked me, oddly happier than usual. "Quite fine actually, and, I don't know, cheerful." I answered, walking, well more limping over to the bathroom. "You excited about coming home?" Carly asked through the door. "Yeah, more or less." I quickly responded.

"Way to be cheerful Fredweird." Sam scoffed. "Sam! Be nice." Carly scowled at her. I overheard the argument and opened the door, dressed in wind pants and a sweatshirt. "Listen, now that you guys are fully aware of my… problem, I still want you guys to act normal around me, no special treatment, I- Ow! Sam! Why did you punch me?" I questioned, rubbing my arm. "Hey, you said you didn't want any special treatment, and according to my schedule, you are majorly overdue." She grinned.

It took my mom a few hours to get me completely checked out, apparently the wanted to run a few more test to see if I was completely fine. During that, Carly and Sam kept me company, I guess still trying to cope with the fact their best friend had bipolar. About ever thirty minutes, Sam would randomly punch me, but it wasn't in anger, because every time I watched her face, her eyes would spark with something I've never seen before. Weird, but anyway…

We all got into my mom's car and drove back to Bushwell. The drive seemed long as the skyscrapers passed by; I've never noticed how beautiful the sun shone on the glass panes. My thoughts were yet again interrupted by a sudden pain in the shoulder. "Oh come on! I will reach back there and… I don't know… didn't think that far ahead… Never mind Puckett." I stated, knowing Sam was smiling from ear to ear. We pulled into the parking lot, Sam and Carly both helped me up to our floor. My mom thanked them and unlocked our apartment and walked in. As I started to close the door, Sam walked up and hugged me. "Just to let you know, your beatings are done." She whispered in my ear before letting go of me and opening the door to the Shays apartment. "Oh, and glad you're back Nub." She smiled. Man, am I glad to be home.

**A/N: Eh, what do you think? See, Sam isn't all that evil. Or maybe it's part of her plan! Ooohh! Lol, it's up to you. Anyway, consider this an early Christmas present. Computer still isn't back, so probably another four days before the next update. Well, if I don't get one uploaded before then, Merry Christmas to you all! **


	7. iTell Carly

**iTell Carly**

**Sam's POV**

What? Don't think like that. Just because I hugged the dork doesn't mean I have any feelings or any of that chiz! I'm just happy that he's back, now I have my personal punching bag back, and momma's happy. Oh, and the fact I, Sam Puckett, is helping the little nub control himself. Yes, I actually do care about something other than ham.

"SAM!" I heard someone yell. "What the chiz! You don't have to scream." I complained, snapping out of my little thought-land. "My god Sam, I was trying to get your attention for like, 5 minutes. You seem to be easily distracted." Carly stated. "Only when your thinking…" I mumbled. "What was that?" Carly scowled, her eye's glaring at me. "Nothing, nothing. What did you want?"

"Well, I guess I can repeat my question AGAIN." She grumbled, "I know it's late, but do you want to rehearse for iCarly? Now that Freddie is back, we can do our show tomorrow." Carly stated, drinking some of her "special lemonade." "Sure, sounds good with me." I grinned, jumping over the couch. "Whoa, what's up with you? I haven't seen you this happy since we won that cooking show, and you received all of that steak… Which I'm still not sure how you can eat all of it, but then I remind myself it's Sam, and everything makes sense." Carly explained to herself. "Glad you figured it out, and the reason I'm happy is-" I started before the door swung open.

We both turned around to see the Freddie standing in the doorway, smiling. "Hey, what up ladies." He commented, walking in. "Not much dishrag, how are you… feeling?" I said, giving the impression that it hurt when I asked it. "Sorry if my feelings are such a burden for you." Freddie joked. "Are you sure you can rehearse with us?" Carly questioned, probably worried that nub would have another heart attack. "Don't worry, I'm perfectly fine, as long as…" He started before turning to me, looking me directly in the eyes. "What? Oh, jeez, don't worry yourself Freddork, I already told you that, for now, your beatings are done with… But don't get cocky, if I think it's needed, I will beat you down." I grinned, watching his eyes fill with what I assumed was fear.

We all walked up to the studio, Carly and I jumped onto the beanbags and turned on the TV while Frednerd prepared his nerd cart for the rehearsal. "Crud, I forgot the USB that has the photos on it." Freddie stated, noticing both Sam and Carly staring at him with blank expressions, "You know, the ones for that we picked out for the Reaction Faction bit?" He said, trying to get us to remember. "Never mind, I'll be back shortly." Freddie mumbled, running out of the studio to his apartment. Carly and I looked at each other, "Guess we better get warmed up."

"Yeah, I guess so." I groaned, putting my hand out for Carly to grab. "No! You're not crippled!" She laughed. "But I'm tired… And you know when momma is tired, the person closet to her has to do everything." I stated, still waving my hand at her. "Fine!" Carly finally agreed, trying to pull me up off of the ground. "C'mon woman! Let's go!" I commanded. "Shut up before I drop you!" Carly struggled to say, finally getting the strength to pull me to my feet. "See, now was that hard?" I teased. "You're heavy. You need to cut back on those fatcakes." Carly observed.

"Um… No." I grinned. "Alright! Time to do some crazy dance warm-ups." Carly exclaimed, starting to jump up and down. "Yeah!" I agreed, joining her. We were almost done when I heard something hit the floor, and make a rattling sound. Oh no. I opened my eyes to see a small orange container at Carly's feet. DID I FORGET TO TAKE THOSE OUT OF MY PANTS! I screamed in my head. I knew it! I knew it! I knew I forgot to do something when I went home to grab something for iCarly. I was frozen in shock, unable to pick up the pills that had appeared before my best friend. "Sam… Um… What are these?" Carly asked, picking them up.

"Um, I don't know, maybe Freddie's bipolar pills…" I squeaked out, unable to hide the fact that they were Freddie's. "SAM!" Carly nearly screamed, "Why! You know that he needs these to stay calm, and how could he have taken one if he didn't have any, does this mean he lied to us, I really-" "Carly!" I yelled, interrupting her and her rant. "I gave him some sugar pills that look like the pills." I explained, grabbing the container out of her hand. "Why?" She asked again. "Listen, as weird as this may be, I was actually scared that we might have lost Freddie… Dork! And, um, I wanted to help him, by taking him off the pills, and by giving him the these, proving to him that he can mentally control his disorder, without the use of drugs."

Carly looked at me for a few minutes, I guess trying to analyze what I said. "That's… Nice, I never knew you cared." She said. "Cared about what?" We heard someone ask. We both turned to see Freddie walking in, closing the door behind him. "Um, I was just telling Carly how much I care about Canadian bacon. Which… Sadly, is just ham… Well, that's not that bad." I joked. "Right… That certainly does sound like you Puckett." He commented, going back to work on the computer. "Sam!" Carly whispered. "You have to tell him! He could get in trouble if he isn't taking the right pills!" She demanded. "Are you kidding me? If I tell him, he'll go insane." I stated, looking over shoulder to see Freddie hitting the side of his laptop. "Fine… But if this backfires. I don't care how stronger you are than me… I will kill you."

**A/N: Eh, eh? See what I did there? Now you gotta think of why Sam is cheerful. Not as long as my other chapters, and probably not as good, only got two hours of sleep last night. Well, yet again, Merry Christmas. Now, off to see Tron!**


	8. iWant Answers

**iWant Answers**

Freddie's POV

"And that's all for tonight! Remember, stay in school, and don't make a raccoon mad!" Sam exclaimed into the camera. "And we're clear!" I cheered. "Whoo!" Carly cheered before starting her victory dance with Sam. "Awesome job tonight ladies, personally, I think one of your best episodes." I commented, placing my camera back on my cart. "Thanks Freddie!" Carly responded. "Yeah, thanks Freddork." Sam stated, plopping down on her beanbag.

"It's nice to have you back too Freddie. Feeling alright?" Carly asked, looking concerned. "Yeah, I'm fine. Don't worry about me." I said, making sure Carly understood I'm fine. "Fine, don't get snippy with me." She laughed. "Snippy?" Sam joked, "Who says snippy these days?" Carly looked at her with a gleam of hate. "Hey! You say chizz! Is that any better than snippy?" She demanded. "Eh, depends on how cool you are. Now shush, Girly Cows is on." Sam said, turning back towards the TV.

"Sam! Are you saying I'm not cool?" Carly whined. "Carly… Don't even try." I laughed, checking the views on tonight's episode. "But! But! Never mind… You're probably right… I'm going to go get some blue tea, anyone want any?" Carly asked Sam and I, who both nodded at the request, "Alrighty, I guess the silent head nods are good enough." She commented before heading out the door. I looked out to make sure she was indeed gone, and then opened my mouth to ask the question I had for… at least two days… wondered.

"Hey Sam… Mind if I ask you a question?" I wondered, thinking in the back of my mind I was about to die. "You know Freddly, normally I would hit you in the head with this remote for interrupting me during Girly Cows, but, lucky you, it's a commercial, so shoot nub." Sam answered, turning towards me, looking me directly in the eyes. I breathed in, and asked the preliminary question, "When I ask this, can you try and resist the urge to laugh… Or hurt me emotionally or physically?" I demanded. "Oh come on, have I ever done that?" She laughed, before realizing she does it everyday.

"Right… Just ask the stupid question before I lose focus." Sam stated. "Why did you hug me?"

Sam's POV

"Why did you hug me?"

What? How do I, Samantha Puckett, answer that? "Because I was happy to have my personal punching bag back." I quickly responded. Good enough. "I thought you said my beatings were done?" Freddie smirked. Dang… He's good. "That was for the time you spent in the hospital…" I stated. Yet again Sam, you have beaten the dork. "Ok then, come hit me. If you aren't done… How come it's been two days since you tortured me in some way?" HE boldly said. Now he's asking for it. "Are you trying to make me angry dork? Because it's working. And the two day thing… It's like when I said that I would get you back for that prank you pulled on me. Keep you on your toes."

"Just wondering… Don't get angry Princess." Freddie joked. Ok, that tears it. "Don't you ever… EVER… Call me…" I started to yell. "Call you what?" He smirked. "Nothing… nothing. Just go back to doing your dorkish agenda, momma's got to watch her show." I said. Wait… Why did I just do that? I backed down from Frednub… A nub! What's with me today, I can't get angry, I my mind refuses to make him angry. It's not like I care for the dork. Sure, he had a heart attack and is taking false pills. Well, maybe… Just maybe, I…

"Blue tea for the masses!" Someone yelled, interrupting my thoughts, and thank goodness. Who knows where that could have lead. "One for you! One for you! And one for me!" Carly cheerful sung as she passed them out. After setting the tray down, she plopped down next to me and started watching Girly Cows. We spent a few minutes focused in before we heard a laptop being closed. "Well, I'm done for tonight. Got to get home, my mom wants to make sure all my… I guess vitals are alright." Freddie said. "Ok, text me when you are done. I want to make sure you are still alright." Carly demanded. "Fine, fine, see you guys tomorrow." He said with a wave of his hand. "See ya dork." I mumbled, too focused on the cartoon in front of me.

It was about 9 before I realized that it was… well… 9. "Sam, shouldn't you be heading home? Or… as usual, are you going to stay over?" She asked, turning off the TV. "Jeez Carls, you say that like a bad thing. And… yes, I am. Mind if I borrow the usual." I wondered, jumping up from the beanbag. "Yes, you want the same PJ's and everything else?" Carly joked. "Might as well… One thing though?" I wondered before heading down the stairs. "And what would that be Sam?" She asked. "Can I have some bacon?"

Carly smiled before heading downstairs to make momma's night snack. As soon as I heard her hit the last step of the stairs, I sat down on the bench and started thinking about what came over me during my fight with Benson. Why did I back down? Why did I let him believe he was the victor? And... what was that stupid feeling that was in my stomach when we made eye contact? I can't... actually like him, can I? No! I'm Sam Puckett, I like NO ONE, let alone that dork... But then again, ever since that night on the fire escape, I have... had something for him. And that makes me wonder, why did I hug him? Was it because I was just happy he was back and not dead, or was it because I actually cared? And why did I take his pills? A prank by my evil self, or something else... What the chizz! I can't actually like the nub... can I?

**A/N: Hey guys… Sorry about the short chapter, and the late update. Been lots going on. Don't worry the chapters will improve, and things will start getting… CRAZIER! Hazzah! Next update soon… I hope. **


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